That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
