Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize