2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
you would pick up someone in the library
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
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