bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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