birth control should be required to get into college
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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