this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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