LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
do nipples grow back?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
