I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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