One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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