Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
