i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
