Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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