It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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