We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
