Jerry, you need to find god
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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