I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize