Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
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