paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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