He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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