i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
