How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
whose ass print is on the piano?
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
