We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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