but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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