So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
i out mim tonsoeep
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
