Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
