dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
