All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Randomize
