Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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