I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
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