so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Randomize
