seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
