If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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