Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
