I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
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