Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize