R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
