ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
