she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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