I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
