You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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