I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
