Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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