Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy sore nipples Batman
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize