Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
