you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
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