so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
