i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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