So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
