There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize