I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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