Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
